Missional Marriage

7 years ago we were only two weeks away from our wedding. I don't know about you, but I am a sucker for sentiment. I love reminiscing. With our anniversary approaching, I have found myself saying to Dan, "Do you remember what we were doing 7 years ago on this day?" Sometimes he plays along and tries to guess. But more often, I just go straight into telling him what I am remembering. "We were having a wedding shower at my cousin's house. That was such a great night with our family."....or I've said, "7 years ago today, we closed on our first home. Remember when we were so excited to be married and live TOGETHER in our very first home?!?"

However, with this type of recollection, it also causes us to look back at the sometimes hard truths of how life and marriage has turned out drastically different than either of us had ever expected. I remember thinking for most of my life that the events of my life would go like this...Happy wedding showers followed by a memorable wedding day followed by living in a beautiful home to having sweet baby showers to then welcoming lots of children.

But for us, it didn't happen this way. Instead, what God did give us was a mission in our marriage. And for us, this is far more than we could have ever imagined. 

Let me explain more. As most of my close friends and family know, we weren't given the gift of getting pregnant in the early years of our marriage. However, God didn't take away our desire to have children. At this point, Grace Church enters our story. Grace kept putting before us the huge need for foster parents. There was a great need for families who would welcome foster children into their homes. They were in need of folks who could help parents who are experiencing difficulty in their lives by caring for their children. Dan and I began the process of praying and asking God what it would look like to open ourselves up to this idea. 

What we found on the other side of this process was God's great affection for us. We found blessings that we didn't know possible. We experienced his kindness and grace for us. God gave us an opportunity to experience what Paul was describing in the first chapter of Ephesians. He has confirmed over and over that if we will allow him to, He works everything in conformity with the purpose of his will (Ephesians 1:5). Through this process, we began to see when we submit ourselves and lay our own plans down before God, He begins to transform us to care about the things he cares about. To love the things he loves. For His will to become our will. 

When our wills started to closer align with God's will, it became clearer what we were to do. I must add here that this is a process, part of His sanctification process for us. It is more of an ebb and flow than a destination. It is a daily struggle. I lay down my will and ask God to work, then I sometimes pick it back up again and try to work out my own plans for my life. Until I am reminded again of God's truth, at which He graces me the ability to lay it back down and surrender to Him...again.

So, seven years later, here we are...not only remembering...but also counting. Counting our blessings. Not only our physical blessings of our two boys who are no longer in foster care, but our adopted sons, but also our spiritual blessing of a missional marriage. Through this journey, God invited us to care about the things he cares about and therefore gifted us with a mission. A mission that called us to lay down our own ideas and plans and one that allows us to partner together with each other. But more importantly, one that glorifies God and helps accomplish His mission as husband and wife in this world. The mission of caring for orphans and vulnerable children. The mission of partnering with our church and organizations like Miracle Hill. We have considered it a privilege to partner with Miracle Hill as they live out their mission in Greenville, which is to give homeless children and adults food and shelter with compassion and hearing the Good news of Jesus.

This anniversary, Dan and I are looking forward to celebrating our missional marriage as we are only weeks away from opening our home again to another child. And to be completely honest, we wouldn't trade the gift of this mission with any plan that we could have come up with on our own.  

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ" Ephesians 1:3